Review: 'Artemis Fowl' Flounders Instead of Taking Flight

Criminal mastermind...it's in his blood!

Based on the best-selling Young Adult adventure series by author Eoin Colfer, "Artemis Fowl" is Hollywood's latest attempt at finding its next "Harry Potter" and capitalize on an audience that has already grown up and gone on to embrace the heartbreak of "The Twilight Saga" and the fierceness of "The Hunger Games," and is chasing after "Fantastic Beasts." The story follows a 12-year-old prodigy and super-genius, who is not entirely likable and may be destined to inherit a diabolical fate.

From director Kenneth Branagh, from a script by Conor McPherson and Hamish McColl, "Artemis Fowl" (which was intended for the big screen) has premiered on the subscriber-based Disney+. Putting big movies on streaming is a maneuver that paid in spades with the animated "Onward," just as the onset of COVID-19 forced many families into self-quarantine, but it may not prove as profitable for this larger-than-life film, which straddles two genres. "Artemis Fowl" stars Colin Farrell and Judi Dench, and features Ferdia Shaw in the title role.

Living in a lavish manor on the edge of a cliff in Ireland, Artemis attends an elite school and relishes outsmarting his professors and isolating himself from the rest of the student body. His father, Artemis Fowl, Sr. (Farrell), is a collector of rare antiquities and travels often for work, circling the world and gathering exquisite articles of fascination, many of which are highly prized historical items. Artemis worships his father and has listened intently to the countless stories of a magical world hidden from human eyes and fairy lore, many of which have lulled him to sleep.

When his father is kidnapped and accused of being a criminal mastermind, Artemis has little choice but to swing into action and uncover the origins of a device called the Aculos, which is perhaps the most dangerous weapon ever created. Realizing that the only way save his dad is to find the Aculos, Artemis is determined to find the truth behind the fairytales his father raised him on, and discovers that myth and magic are real! Teaming up with fairy agent Holly Short (Lara McDonnell) and his bodyguard Domovoi Butler (Nonza Anozie), Artemis' adventure begins.

This is one of those instances where the book outshines its live-action adaptation. "Artemis Fowl" doesn't make any attempt to establish the world these characters inhabit as tenderly as its contemporaries have. Among the charms of the "Harry Potter" films is the realization that as Harry is initiated into the wizarding world, so are we. Here, the film thrusts the audience immediately into it all, not making the slightest effort to make its lead character attractive or ingratiate him to the viewer; it's hard to feel sympathetic to our hero when we hardly know him.

The CGI-generated and hyper-stylized fairy world we're asked to believe exists beneath the earth is excruciatingly alien and hard to imagine, unlike the contemporary vampires of "The Twilight Saga" or the realm in which "Fantastic Beasts" operates. It's lacks any substance and all credibility. "Artemis Fowl" is full of spectacle, jumping from one attraction to the next, but there's hardly any time for us to catch our breath, and when we do it's very difficult to want to get back on the ride.

Hoping to have inspired a new franchise film series, "Artemis Fowl" will make fans of the book series scratch their heads, and turn instead to the film studio inside their own imaginations – a multiplex that flickers with far more interesting pictures and grander scope while turning the pages of a book. "Artemis Fowl" may get a second chance with a follow-up installment, but this first flick hardly is worth the investment.

"Artemis Fowl" is streaming now on Disney+